Thursday, July 24, 2014

What might have been?

I guess that's what I wanted to say.
What?
That I thought we really had something here. That's all.
Me too.



So now it is I who should forgive the sweet liar (for no such optimism should go unpunished).

____________________________________________

He still tells me he loves me every morning
and as I emerge from a haze of restless dreams
I often wonder if, with each passing day, in these tragically sweet moments,
and before the commitment of dawn
if he means it a little less than the day before.

Overtones of disappointment punctuate our every move.
Our present is muted by our future and what might have been a great love recedes as quietly as it came. 

I study his face - 
his pores
the crinkles near his eyes
hints of silver at his temples.
He can stare at the ceiling, expressionless,
for so long
but when I ask him what he is thinking he says
nothing
and I'm afraid that I believe him.

Meanwhile

my brain is abuzz with sensation
constantly churning and negotiating and wondering
(overthinking)

and this is how I know he will do fine when I am gone for good.



4 comments:

  1. I know this feeling... we had something worth fighting for... now I don't know any more... I'm always over thinking it all too...

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  2. Forgiving the sweet liar, what a hard thing to do. Moving on and up is so hard, but it is such a strength if you are able to do it. Beautiful words, love.

    Em
    Tightrope to the Sun

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  3. he's thinking of you for sure

    all my love
    xx

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  4. People are always thinking of something, he who tells you otherwise is a liar. Makes for excitment though, thinking about what they are hiding.

    /Avy

    http://mymotherfuckedmickjagger.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete